Reflections on cultural pride and self-esteem
“To know that cultural pride and self-esteem are two different things”
— Mariahadessa Ekere Tallie
I came across this quote in a caption, and it got me reflecting on the presence of culture in life. Culture is a living, breathing entity fuelled by interactions with the self, each other and natural surroundings; reflecting ideas and instinctive desires to create and adapt. Such interactions can help in facilitating healthy self-esteem, yet it is important to remember that culture can only go so far in providing assistance. You, as the individual self, must also be willing to be there for you. Culture is like a toolbox that can help you in carrying out the maintenance work needed for a healthy self-esteem.
There is pride and celebration to be had in witnessing how culture can serve as a mirror to unveil features of the past that carry so much wisdom for the benefit of the present. Being proud of where you come from is a very uplifting experience. Personally, that sense of pride helped in the process of addressing some of the internalised shame about heritage that I carried with me as a child growing up. However, the wisdom within culture doesn’t simply exist only to be celebrated, it’s there to be used and applied within life. Failure to do so risks getting caught in a celebratory loop, in a constant state of being in awe of the past yet not taking proactive steps to apply the wisdom that can aid the present.
Aboro la n so fun omoluwabi
We give small advice to a child of God
This Yoruba proverb speaks to the importance of not being complacent with wisdom. Wisdom comes from being and doing. In the case of self-esteem, ‘the work’ doesn’t stop because of past achievements. Who are you beyond the visual aesthetics of where you come from? I began to ask myself this question after realising that simply celebrating achievements of the past was still not shaking off prolonged feelings of low self-esteem I experienced. I was being complacent in thinking that I could read my way through past achievements to improve my self-esteem; a kind of learning that remained in the confines of the abstract or once-off celebrations and get togethers, instead of embodying this learning through daily life choices.
What does it mean to embody the wisdom of culture in everyday life? An example of this can be seen in the presence of Adire, a beautiful tie-dye cloth that was traditionally made using natural resources; from the cotton to produce the fabric, to the plants used to create the indigo colours that it is famed for. The stories that lie within this piece of cloth are abundant. Personally, it reflects the story of embracing patience. Cultivating crops to make the fabric, working with leaves to make the colours, artisans designing shapes and patterns to go on the cloth, to the process of making clothing from the fabric – every single stage of the process of making Adire pays homage to patience. It is a cloth which teaches the importance of accepting and appreciating that things of quality take time to come to fruition. This message can be applied to life in general, particularly with regards to gauging the level of patience you have for yourself and others.
How are you interacting with culture?
This thing called culture has depth, it reflects a plethora of stories and wisdom that nurture connections between past, present and future. How are you choosing to apply the wisdom gained from the process of paying attention to the stories embedded within the cultural practices of where you come from? This can come in the form of creating space for dialogue between self and culture. A kind of dialogue shaped around fluidity, commitment, and honesty. A fluidity that recognises that neither the self or culture are static, a commitment that recognises that this dialogue is centred around everyday life and not reserved only for special occasions, and an honesty that recognises that this dialogue is not a one-way approach in which engaging with heritage is something you just do sporadically without question. It is more so an opportunity to feel your way through and scrutinise so that you are equipped to assess if it adequately assists you in carrying out the work of maintaining a healthy self-esteem.